Poor, hapless Greg. On the premiere episode of the final season of Succession, Greg the Egg (Nicholas Braun) made the grave mistake of bringing a date, Bridget (Francesca Root-Dodson)—someone who may not be completely familiar with how the other half lives—to Logan’s birthday. The evidence? Her choice in accessories, which Tom (Matthew Macfadyen) expertly skewered, setting the internet ablaze with his absolutely withering read of her “ludicrously capacious bag.”
“Why?” snarls Tom at Greg, explaining his date’s faux pas. “Because she’s brought a ludicrously capacious bag. What’s even in there, huh? Flat shoes for the subway? Her lunch pail? I mean, Greg, it’s monstrous. It’s gargantuan. You could take it camping. You could slide it across the floor after a bank job.”
Clearly, the nearly $2,900 Burberry bag was a fashion don’t. Its shape (boxy enough for a lunch pail), its size (monstrous, gargantuan even) is simply all wrong for a high-society event. Bridget should have known Logan’s birthday was a Birkin-only space (Kelly preferred)—maybe a Telfar, if paired with the right shoes. Faux pas doesn’t even begin to cover it. The internet is well aware, taking Tom’s incredibly specific insult and running with it. You just know that if Succession were set in Austen-era England, Mr. Darcy would have said the same thing.